I just want to start this post with a huge, gut-wrenching sigh. It's been a long month so far. My NaNoWriMo isn't going perfectly, but it is going. At this very moment I'm at 21,036 words. I should be in the 25,000-26,000 range. I'm not uber behind, but I'm certainly not ahead either. Usually when I get really into a story I can pound out 20 pages or so a day. My page count is 79 after 15 days...do the math. In case you're not a math genius like me (ha!) this basically means that I'm not in love with my story. It's not awful, it has a plot, it has believable characters, so what's the issue?
Basically, my characters are depressed and it's depressing me. Rightfully, they should be depressed, their lives suck. And a few of them have no redeeming qualities as people, which makes me hate writing them. Even my MC is falling apart despite her best efforts. I kind of want to shake them and scream in their faces "GET IT TOGETHER!!!" Of course they won't listen to me, they never do. But seriously, their issues are holding me back. How am I supposed to get excited about a girl who is so depressed and has no self esteem and only views alcohol and random flings as a way to survive. Yuck. She's just taking after her alcoholic mother, though. Oh! And let's not forget all the situations that make everything so much worse. Missed phone calls, ignored texts...
It's too much like real life! Aha! I've found the issue. Perhaps in the future I will know to stick only to the fantasy/paranormal/sci-fi. This real life shit kills me (and depresses me).
This post is depressing. I apologize.
All the best,
Kacey
